Well as some may know my brother Jake has been trying to get custody of his daughter Aliya. He went to court yesterday and both sides ended up agreeing to Joint custody, except Aliya will be with her mom more days than she is with Jake, but Jake has a say in major events in Aliya's life which is great and Aliya will be named Aliya Elizabeth Smith-Hafen(long I know but at least the Hafen is in there). Well I am not blogging to tell you what they agreed on, I am blogging because I was supposed to be a character witness for my brother yesterday, since they settled, it did not actually go to trial so I have some things that I want to say that I did not get to say yesterday! So here it goes(Also I am not trying to offend anyone but some things need to get said ya know) My brother Jake is an amazing father. Aliya and Jake have one of the cutest, closest father-daughter bonds that I have seen. Jake would do anything and everything thing in his power to give his daughter the best life has to offer. Jake is not a sit back and let others take care of my daughter type of guy, from the beginning, when ever Aliya was permitted to be with Jake, he has always been right there, changing the diapers, dealing with tantrums, kissing boo boos, reading bedtime stories, everything. He did not want to miss any moment of his daughters life. Now if any of you know the whole messed up complicated story of Jake and Nellie you will know that Jake has to prove himself a million times more worthy to be with his daughter and I feel that he is being royal screwed. Now do not take this the wrong way I love the Smith family despite all that has gone on I have grown up with them my whole life and I am truly happy for Nellie and I hope her and Tim have a happy and wonderful life together and by no means is this a jab at her and her family, I just do not understand why two families cannot work out their differences for the common good. I Believe Aliya deserves both her parents in her life. Not only that but deserves to know both families. We love Aliya and miss her too when Jake does not have her. I just cannot understand why this whole situation had to even be brought to court. My brother, though he chooses to do some things that I don't agree with, is not a bad parent at all. In fact in some areas he is a better parent than me. He makes time for his daughter. He takes her to the park, takes her to the farm, he is always thinking about his daughter and things they can do together, how he can make his home funner for her. He is an amazing person and just because right now he is not a worthy priesthood holder and is questioning the LDS religion does not make him a bad father or person! Again I know that he has made some mistakes in the past and makes mistakes now (but seriously who doesn't) but I now that my brother loves his daughter and me and my family have hope and faith the he will come back to this gospel. I think many would have strayed with only a fraction of the hypocritial things that Jake has had to endure, that people have done and said to him about not only himself but his entire family. Again we are all human, have made mistakes and have all strayed from the gospel to some degree or another. For some it takes a little bit longer to make it back but by no means should this be a criteria for him having custody over his daughter. I love my brother and believe with all my heart that he deserves his daughter in his life as much as she deserves to have him in hers. Both Nellie and Jake are capable parents and there is no real reason why she cannot have both equally in her life. It is my hope and prayer that the Hafen & Smith family can once again all be friends and be able to have holiday parties & ALiya's birthday together and be able to forgive and forget and be happy for everyone so that Aliya can have a loving supportive family from both her biological mother & father, Jake & Nellie!! Because no matter what anyone thinks of my brother, he knows how to make one cute baby!! I love you Jake!!
9 comments:
i couldnt have said it better. i wish we could have been there for support but i am glad things were able to be worked out.
love you jake and ali.
I am so glad that it worked out. I know you guys all love that little girl. Congrats Jake! (ashlee)
i'm glad jake gets his sweet little girl more often in his life. he is a WONDERFUL person and a very loving FATHER. he's definetly a GREAT dad!! by the way jackie....your family is getting cuter and cuter by the minute!! how are you and matt doing?? love ya guys,
rob and cortni :)
sheesh!! Very well put! sad to say i dont see much changing but we can all have hope and wish for the best! that little girl means the world to our brother and he deserves the right to have her just as much as nellie does! Its sad that things have to be the way that they are! and that he has to fight with everything he has in him just to get her for 10 days! im just glad that he was able to get that! I couldnt even imagine only seeing Ali for 2 days out of the month (wich nellie was fighting for) i hope she realizes that ali is a part of our life wether she likes it or not! we love that little girl! she means just as much to us then she does to the smith family! He did the right thing fighting for her and im proud of him for being brave! One Day i Hope and Pray This will all be resolved in a matter that it should of been in the FIRST place!!!!!
That is great that he fought for her. You know I wish there were more fathers out there that would do that for THEIR children.
Well put Jacks I couldn't agree more! This battle has gone on for way to long and its time for it to end! It's time to FORGIVE, let go, and be happy! We all love Aliya and Jake and he is such a wonderful dad to Ali (if you just look at the two of them its clear to see). Hopefully this settlement will help resolve some of those issues.
Wow. I say that with pride. I guess i am just amazed. Jackie is always a little quite but i guess you do get loud when you do believe in something and you say it very well. (The Jackie i remember) I know that it could be hard when you see family members go through a hard time and it seems like no one will give them a brake, but in time and a lot of prayer things seem to all work out. And you almost have to sometimes just move on even if others dont. Keep it up Jake. Life can be hard but those that keep trying show true character.
Amazing Apple Jax!!!
Jackie,
Wow, very well put. I agree with everything you said. "DIDO!!!!!"
You are absolutely right about everything you said. And yes, if I were you I would have wanted to post my feelings also.
Jake is an awesome father. And deserves split time with Ali.
You brought tears to my eyes reading your letter. (I guess I get it from Matt!) But again, I can't say enough.......Great Job! I loved what you had to say!
Brenda
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